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Red Hawk tattoo

Red Hawk tattoo

Two of our authors, Elizabeth Grace Frank-Backman and Stephanie Pasquarelli have started a new project called The Survivor’s Ink Project.

The Survivor’s Ink Project is assembling a gallery of tattoos survivors of abuse and violence have gotten to celebrate their lives. The pictures will be posted in an on-line gallery here at If She Cry Out and also on the project’s facebook page.

The project showcases survivors as masters of transformation: turning the darkest of human experiences into lessons of hope, beauty, and power. One survivor’s tattoo reads the same both right side up and upside down as if to say “No reality, however upside down, can take away a survivor’s fundamental nature”.

Other tattoos show a warrior woman rising above rainbows, flowers twining, a hawk soaring, and a spirited horse rearing. Rarely are tattoos the same. No two stories are alike. The essential creativity of being human becomes ever clearer when we rise above the inconceivable and embrace life.

If you are a survivor of abuse or violence of any kind, e-mail us your photo and a brief paragraph explaining why you chose the tattoo and what it means to you. The tattoo can represent celebration of any kind: your journey, life, experiences, struggles, success’, or anything else that symbolizes being a survivor for you.

To submit a tattoo, please send the following to TheSurvivorsInkProject at gmail.com :

  • a photo of your tattoo
  • a paragraph explaining why you chose that tattoo and what it means to you (whatever you feel safe sharing).
  • the name or alias under which you would like to be associated with it – you are welcome to use either an alias or your own name, whatever you feel most comfortable with.
  • the country you live in (so eventually we can do a map of survivor tattoos around the world!)
  • optional: a web address/link that you want associated with your name or alias (blog, facebook,myspace).


If you don’t wish to send a tattoo, you can still support this project by

  • “like”ing the project on facebook: The Survivor’s Ink Project
  • sharing or emailing this post – see the buttons at the bottom of this post
  • telling a survivor you know about this project
  • if you work with survivors, letting your organization and colleagues know about this project
  • if you are a tattoo artist, telling your fellow artists and appropriate clients

When a terrorism attack breaks out, the event consumes news channels. Reporters are eager to interview survivors and the general public craves immediate updates on Fox and Sky TV. But weeks, months, and years later the attack is often forgotten to all but the survivors and their closest friends. The plentiful articles and coverage become hard to find on the web and the story disappears. All that is left is a brief description in a list of terrorist attacks on Wikipedia and various advocacy websites and blogs.

Several survivors and videographers are fighting to change that. In the last year a number of documentaries have been released chronically the experience of survivors during the crisis and the years after. These stories cover the impact of terrorism across Asia and the Middle East.

But more than that, they drive home an essential truth known by survivors. Terror does not stop life. When we only see the immediate horror of a terror attack we get a distorted view that minimizes both bad and good. We see the terror, but not the true cost played out over time. We see chaos and loss, but not the reflective processes that lead to insight, courage, and a creative drive to counter horror with justice.

Jordan

Killing in the Name, directed by Jed Rothstein, tells the story of Ashraf al-Khaled who lost 27 members of his wedding party in the November 9, 2005 Amman hotel bombings. One of Rothstein’s goals was to move beyond the tragedy and explore how al-Khaled integrated what happened into his on-going life and work. The documentary was nominated for an Oscar in 2010. For screening information contact the Global Survivors Network.

Pakistan

FIVE , directed by Khurrum Mahmood , tells the story of five Pakistani survivors – screened during the Cannes International Film Festival . The documentary features the experience of five survivors: Waqar Khalid, Sayed Ali Shah, Ifran Malik, Nawab Sheer, and Tahir Malik. Tahir Malik is one of the founders of the Pakistan Terrorism Survivors Network, a group that works to support survivors of the many terrorist attacks within Pakistan. For screening information contact the Global Survivors Network.

“I Witness” records the reflections of people of three different faiths who were survivors of the Decmeber 28, 2009 Karachi Ashura bombing. One survivor concludes that the terrorists have undercut their own methods:

They think they can scare us from death, but they have forgotten that martyrdom is an honour for us. These terror attacks have taken away the fear of death from our hearts. But it doesn’t mean that we don’t cry or we don’t feel grief. It’s actually that we have learned to reply cruelty with our patience. We want to tell the terrorists that great nations can survive in any situation. They keep on living happily.”

The documentary was shown during The London International Documentary Festival (May 13-28, 2011).

India

Beyond Mumbai: Hope and Healing tells the story of the November 26, 2008 Mumbai Bombings through the eyes of several survivors who were on a trip together with Alan and Naomi Scherr. Alen and Naomi Scherr were killed in the bombing. The documentary is in five parts: 1 2 3 4 5

Indonesia

“Prison and Paradise”, directed by Daniel Rudi Haryanto, follows the stories of five Muslim children orphaned by the Bali bombing attack. It demonstrates the irony of religiously motivated terrorism: the terrorist attacks perpetrated in the name of Islam increased the number of orphans, a group which Islam sees as deserving special protection. Not only did the attack leave the children of those murdered without parents. One of the perpetrators had two children that he could not tend to because of being jailed by the attack.

The documentary premiered at the 2010 Dubai International Film Festival. For more information about the film and screenings, see http://prisonandparadise.blogspot.com/.

Israel

“Their eyes were dry” , directed by Brandon Assanti , is a full length film documenting the May 15, 1974 Ma’alot massacre . 22 children and 3 adults were killed when terrorist took hostage a high school in the Galilean town of Ma’alot, Israel. The story of the massacre is told through the eyes of the now adult children who were held hostage. The movie was screened in several theatres across the USA on May 9, 2011. For screening information and stills, see http://www.theireyesweredry.com/.

Organizational sponsorship

“FIVE” and “Killing in the Name” are projects of the Global Survivors Network, a group advocating against terrorism. It was founded by terror attack survivors Ashraf al-Khaled (Amman hotel bombings) and Carie Lemack (9/11) as an outgrowth of their work together on Killing in the Name.

“Beyond Mumbai: Hope and Healing” is a project of Odyssey Networks .

“I Witness” was developed with the help of Pocket Visions Filmaking for Social Change. The project provides young Pakistanki filmakers with the training needd to make their own films.

Raven overlooking canyon

Credit: Al_HikesAZ @ Flickr.com

We’ve been on hiatus so this week’s roundup will include a few tidbits from earlier in the year and not just the last week.

Survivor artists, writers and activists

Anne Jacoby

Ayanna Nahmias

Beth Fehlbaum

Erin Merryn

  • On February 14, 2011, after many years of advocacy, Erin’s law was signed by the Governor of Illinois. We congratulate her and all who have worked along side of her on their efforts. The law ensures that school aged children will be educated about child sexual abuse prevention. Erin Merryn herself is a survivor of childhood sexual assualt. For her story and future plans,see her website.

Ginger Voight

  • Tells the story of the first time she told her story of stranger rape at age 4 and contrasts that with the reception that Ben Stein gave the Strauss-Kahn story in the American Spectator.

Maria DiBari

Wendy Blight

Survivor founded organizations and projects

First Response Action, started by a group of Peace Corp volunteers who had been raped during their Peace Corp service, works to improve prevention and care for Peace Corp volunteers who have been assulted during their service.

PAVE, started by Angela Rose, survivor of a knife-point abduction at 17. The organization encourages and empowers survivors to work towards the elimination of sexual violence.

Survivors in Action is a project of Alexis A. Moore, a survivor of cyber-stalking. The organization focuses on raising awareness about domestic violence and stalking survivors who fall through the cracks. Recent activities include

Stilletos and Self-Defense is a project of Jennifer Cassetta, a survivor of attempted assault and the 9/11 terrorist attacks. She discusses her motivations for the project. From time to time her blog contains various self defense tips including this interesting set of safety tips for actresses: How to Stay Safe at Auditions.

Where’s Your Line is a project of Nancy Schwartzman, a survivor of rape who made a documentary that included her rapists confession that he raped her. The project examines the meaning of consent and advocates to bring the conviction rate for rape in line with the conviction rate for other crimes. In the past month the blog has had posts on:

In addition Where’s Your Line is partnering with Planned Parenthood and the Mount Sinai School of Medicine Sexual Assault and Violence Intervention program to lead a day long seminar on sex, consent, and intimate partner communication.

Raven overlooking canyon

Credit: Al_HikesAZ @ Flickr.com

Survivor Project News

  • Beth Fehlbaum is progressing with her efforts to market a line a young adult novels about survivors of childhood sexual assault and abuse. The first book in the series, Courage in Patience, is now available on Amazon through Marketplace Sellers. The second will be published in October by Westside Books. She has also added a Facebook community page (a.k.a. fan page) to support her marketing efforts.
  • Erin Merryn‘s bill was approved by the Illinois Senate.  The bill must now be approved by the state House of Representatives.  An article on Erin Merryn and her advocacy work was published in Chicago’s Daily Herald.    She has also written a post describing the hearings and the actual vote.
  • Maria Phelps has been working on an amendment to strengthen protections of women whose partners have violated a restraining order. Zebrowski and 8 co-sponsors have introduced bill A. 10736. The bill will prevent a domestic abuser who has violated a restraining order, from being released without seeing a Judge first, or being held for at least 12 hours. The bill was inspired by the case of Isol Cotto who was murdered by her husband when he bailed himself out 2 hours after being jailed for violating a restraining order. (more…)
Student Witch (Marcus J Ranum)

Credit: Marcus J Ranum

What if women could arm their vaginas with teeth? Would that prevent rape?

The use of rape to intimidate reared its ugly head again in March when more than 15,000 facebook users signed up as supporters of a Facebook campaign to rape and murder white attendees to the June, 2010 World Cup games.  The page create great concern because it purported to be sponsored by the ANC Youth League. The ANC denounced the page saying that it was against all forms of hate speech.  Facebook shut the page down.

However, the fact that the page garnered so many supporters has many concerned, including the inventor of a device known as the “Rape-aXe“, Sonnet Ehlers. She believes this device will protect women from rape and is trying to raise money to 30,000 free instances of this device during the world cup games.

The Rape-aXe is a sheath inserted in the vagina. Inside the sheaf are small hooks that grab onto a penis or object forced into the vagina. This is supposed to cause the rapist great pain forcing the rapist to withdraw his penis and rush off to the hospital to have the device removed.

The device has raised the ire of Western anti-rape advocates for placing the onus of rape prevention on the victim, however criticism of the device is not merely a matter of  Westerners imposing their standards on others.

When Sonnet Ehlers proposed the Rape-aXe 5 years ago, the device was denounced in South Africa amid much controversy. South Africa has one of the highest per-capita reported sexual assault rates (1.47 in 1000)  and the actual rape is estimated to be as much as 20 times that.  Social changes to reduce rape rates are making slow if any progress.  To Ehlers and many who first hear about the device, it seems like a way to fight back against rape.   At a minimum, she claims it will make attackers easier to identify.  Rape survivor Charlene Smith, a leading anti-rape activist in South Africa, disagrees, arguing that it was based on fundamental misunderstanding of rape and was likely to increase the number of rapes that end in murder or serious physical harm.  When the device was first released, Smith and several other leading South African anti-rape activists asked that the government ban the sale of the device.

The appeal of the device relies on a host of rape myths and unrealistic assumptions about how rapes are carried out and how they are prosecuted afterward: More »

B is for Healing

B is for bone. We need to understand that we are strong like bones, yes breakable, but also incredibly strong, durable, and resilient. At times we can break, but mostly we endure.

I used to feel all uncomfortable and freaked out about bone, about having bones, about having a skeleton inside of me. But bones are intricate, minute little worlds and a skeleton is a recipe for function and possibilities.

After watching the show “Bones” for several seasons I have concluded that there is reason to love bones and to love being made of bones at my core. Living bones are not like skeletons. Living bones are alive, containing, enfolding, protecting, they make it possible for so much that we are capable of. Rarely do we question it or think about it. Bones are courageous. Survivors are like bones.

B is for ball. One of my brothers told me recently a ball is the most popular toy the world over. I told him, I know that. I read that in a book of children’s games and online as well. I showed him a small, tiny bouncing ball I had brought with me to California from Ohio and before that from Minnesota. I told him it is one of my favorite toys as well. I had been bouncing it out in the backyard earlier in the day. The ability to play is so tied up for me in playing with a ball. I have never lost the ability to play. We all need that. B is for ball.

B is for beauty. Survivors need beauty. We need to breathe in beauty, to soak it deep into our skin, to drink it down, to feast our eyes upon it. Survivors need beauty. We need every reason that we can find to have a reason for joy in this world. We need beauty like others need food or water. We need to have a reason to stay here, we need beauty, we need to find love, something to love, something for us to want, something for us to find joy and happiness with, something to make our hearts beat a little bit faster. Beauty is healing and we need all the healing we can find.

This article originally appeared in Kate1975′s Blog; reprinted with permission.

New Survivor Blogs

  • Silence the Lies, Give Voice a Truth has started a blog “to educate readers of some of the misconceptions about rape that are rampant in our societal subconscious.” She was raped when a fellow guest at the birthday party for a friend’s 9 year old daughter offered to walk her home.

Survivor Project News

  • Marj aka Thriver is fullfilling her dream and learning to draw botanical sketches. She showed off a sample of her developing skills here.
  • Erin Merryn who was sexually abused by her cousin at age 11 has been advocating to change the Illinois school code so that children are informed about how to recognize, report and get help for sexual abuse. On April 19, Tom Bivins formally turned her proposed school code ammendments into a bill and asked her to testify You can see the proposed ammendments here. If you live in Illinois and want to support this bill, we encourage you to contact your state senators and representatives.
  • Denise Brown, whose sister, Nicole Brown, was a victim of domestic violence and murder, has founded the Elite Speakers Bureau. The Bureau meets a need for celebrity and nationally recognized speakers on family and sexual violence for corporations and shelters fundraising events. (more…)

On Monday, the highly publicized trial of Jack Tweed ended in acquittal. The rape case attracted wide spread publicity in the UK because the accused was the widower of a popular reality TV show star, Jade Goody. He married Jade Goody one month before her death of cervical cancer on Mother’s Day, 2009.

Given the high publicity of this case we decided this might be a good opportunity to take a good look at how rape is reported. Feminists often accuse the media of biased reporting in rape cases, but is this true? Most journalists try to do their job well. Perhaps rape cases are so much he said/she said that there really is no fair way to report them?

We reviewed the top 9 newspapers in the UK (as measured by readership) for their coverage of a recent rape trial looking at articles dating from the initial arrest in September 2009 to the acquittal on April 26. These included: The Sun, The Daily Mail, The Daily Mirror, The Daily Telegraph, The Daily Star, The Daily Express, The Guardian, The Independent, and The Financial Times. Here is what we found. More »

April 12, 2010



Later today, thirty-seven miles west of Krakow, Poland, ten thousand high school students, representing forty countries, will join adults of all ages and participate in the March of the Living. There, the “marchers” will retrace the steps of the “March of Death,” the actual route which countless numbers of people were forced to take on their way to the gas chambers at Birkenau, the largest concentration camp complex built by the Nazis during World War II. As is tradition, the March begins at the gate of the Auschwitz I site, with its inscription Arbeit macht frei (“work will set you free”), and concludes at the site of the Auschwitz II – Birkenau camp.

The March will go on as planned, despite Saturday’s air tragedy that took the lives of the Polish President, Lech Kaczynski, his wife, Maria Kaczynski, and dozens of the country’s top political and military leaders. Poland has declared a week of mourning and March participants will express their solidarity with the Polish people by observing a moment of silence.

This year, The March marks 65 years since the liberation of the death camps and the end of World War II and will pay special tribute to the memory of the million and a half children who were killed during the war. Additionally, this year’s program will call attention to survivors from different professional and social fields in order to emphasize how the Jewish community has succeeded in rebuilding a new world out of the ashes of the Holocaust.

A delegation from Israel, led by Jewish Agency Chairman Natan Sharansky and former Chief Rabbi Israel Meir Lau, includes both Holocaust survivors and a cross-section of young Israelis, including internationally ranked tennis player Shahar Peer and film and television actor, Ohad Knoller. Black ribbons have been attached to the delegations’ flags as a visible sign of recognizing, and remembering, Saturday’s tragedy.

about: The mission of the March of the Living is to challenge a new generation of Jews with two of the most significant events of Jewish history – the Shoah and the birth of the State of Israel. It is achieved by bringing Jewish teenagers to many of the key places where these events took place, in order to understand the world that was destroyed and how Israel was established. This is intensified by sharing these experiences with Holocaust survivors.

The program strives to create memories, leading to a revitalized commitment to Judaism, Israel and the Jewish People; allowing March’ers to educate their peers about the Holocaust and to fight those who would deny its history, while forging a dynamic link with Israel.

This article originally appeared in eJewishPhilanthropy.com; reprinted with permission.

As part of our goal of promoting the work of survivor activists, we have added several new categories to our resource section. These categories show case the work of survivors whose experiences have lead them to create works of art, start social entrepreneurship projects, collect stories of survivors, or write their own.

For more information, please check out our two new resource pages, available in a drop-down list under “Resources” in the If She Cry Out website menubar:

In the future we plan to followup with articles on individual activists, their artistic endeavors and the organizations they have started.

If you are a survivor of violent crime or a terror attack or are managing a project or organization started by one, please let us know what you are doing. For contact information, see the contact page.